Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
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