I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
Randomize
