Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
