Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
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