So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
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