where does the pee come out of this thing
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
Randomize
