Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
woke up in my one night stand's bed and barfed all over her floor. she came back from the bathroom, looked at the vomit, looked at me and said "normally i'd tell you to clean it and get the fuck out, but i remember the sex was good, so i'll let it go." Score.
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
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