Apparently mediocre decisions were made last night. I woke up alone in my own bed with my fridge defrosted.
And I didn't go to bed alone. I am buckets of fail.
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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