Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
I overheard a kid saying to his mom at Walmart: "Mommy.. should we buy cups for daddy's spit?"
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
do you know what's more awkward than a positive pregnancy in a public bathroom?
not a thing
walking in on a stranger's positive pregnancy test in a public bathroom
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
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