Those balls look pretty dangerous.
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
You've got to be fucking kidding me. Do you think "Husband drunkenly pees all over floors" is reasonable grounds for divorce? So pissed off right now.
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
Randomize
