do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
25 Cringeworthy Below the Pants Injuries
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
I just gave her a sobriety test in the middle of the baking aisle.
And the results, officer?
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
19 People Confess The Craziest Sex Act They’ve Ever Participated In
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.