Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (216): View more from Ohio

  I don't usually arrange sex via text message

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (216): I don't usually arrange sex via text message http://tfl.nu/akrs
  Replies (8) Good night (1209) Bad night (506)
• Favorite

  (831): View more from California

  There is a man on the balcony beside me who claims he is a triceratops. He roared and asked me for a cigarette, telling me he'd eat me if I refused. I love college.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (831): There is a man on the balcony beside me who claims he is a triceratops. He roared and asked me for a cigarette, telling me he'd eat me if I refused. I love college. http://tfl.nu/9iax
  Replies (25) Good night (7151) Bad night (695)
• Favorite

  (201): View more from New Jersey

  So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (201): So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her. http://tfl.nu/3bi4
  Replies (60) Good night (4197) Bad night (586)
• Favorite

  (703): View more from Virginia

  He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (703): He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now http://tfl.nu/q7km
  Replies (8) Good night (612) Bad night (2499)
• Favorite

  (201): View more from New Jersey

  Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (201): Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here. http://tfl.nu/9um1
  Replies (10) Good night (1576) Bad night (3329)
• Favorite

  (416): View more from Toronto

  Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (416): Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order http://tfl.nu/9jwa
  Replies (12) Good night (5193) Bad night (1206)
• Favorite

  (613): View more from Ontario

  There needs to be a newsfeed for phones... A list of all my drunken calls, texts, BBMs, new contacts, pictures sent AND received, all in chronological order.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (613): There needs to be a newsfeed for phones... A list of all my drunken calls, texts, BBMs, new contacts, pictures sent AND received, all in chronological order. http://tfl.nu/vb6g
  Replies (23) Good night (5035) Bad night (903)
• Favorite

  (315): View more from New York

  Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (315): Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes. http://tfl.nu/lvfu
  Replies (3) Good night (2136) Bad night (928)
• Favorite

  (425): View more from Washington

  Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (425): Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet? http://tfl.nu/nobj
  Replies (5) Good night (3038) Bad night (943)
• Favorite

  (651): View more from Minnesota

  People are yelling about how much they want you here.

  (563): View more from Iowa

  I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (651): People are yelling about how much they want you here. (563): I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled. http://tfl.nu/lpre
  Replies (4) Good night (2424) Bad night (685)
• Favorite

  (337): View more from Louisiana

  You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (337): You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left. http://tfl.nu/h7ai
  Replies (3) Good night (1606) Bad night (536)
• Favorite

  (660): View more from Missouri

  I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.

  (417): View more from Missouri

  It's called being normal.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (660): I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals. (417): It's called being normal. http://tfl.nu/c2qe
  Replies (9) Good night (1378) Bad night (505)
• Favorite

  (507): View more from Minnesota

  My roommate comes home screaming, I brought you home a friend! I thought she brought me a guy...no, she brought home a one-eyed shih tzu.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (507): My roommate comes home screaming, I brought you home a friend! I thought she brought me a guy...no, she brought home a one-eyed shih tzu. http://tfl.nu/j0iq
  Replies (8) Good night (741) Bad night (1196)
• Favorite

  (918): View more from Oklahoma

  He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (918): He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough. http://tfl.nu/jcxc
  Replies (1) Good night (679) Bad night (515)
• Favorite

  (805): View more from California

  Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (805): Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered. http://tfl.nu/wect
  Replies (8) Good night (1920) Bad night (431)

Randomize