I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize
