I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
Randomize
