After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
wow bdsm is so cute
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
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