I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
I woke up wearing a headband made of condoms. It was supposed to be a crown for the "prettiest fag hag" award I won last night. There is lube in my hair. I'm going back to sleep
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
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