I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
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