why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
Tornado booty call.. dedication
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize
