Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
