i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
My dad is sitting where you rode me
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
Randomize
