Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
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