Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
Just pee around me
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
Randomize
