: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
Apparently "Do you want me to ruin your day now or later?" is not a good way to tell someone you're pregnant and it's theirs.
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
Randomize
