my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
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