Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
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