got weed?
I'm really tired of you accidentally texting me when your doing illegal things. I'm taking away your phone.
sorry mom...
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
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