i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
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