I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
Just drug him and when he wakes up be like "you just woke up from a coma, we've been married for the past five years." It'll be like the Vow but fucked up.
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
Such a big mess for such a small penis
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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