Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
I'm drunk and in a paddle boat and my friend won't quit yelling about pandas. Does this ever happen to you?
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
Randomize
