Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
Randomize