To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
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