Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
Randomize
