His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
