just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
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