New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
I answered the door to some Jehovah Witnesses hungover and wearing nothing but a white tshirt. I think they made it the church goal to reform me, we've gotten four pamphlets. My mom's going to make me convert if they keep coming.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
Adulthood is punching a guy in the face when you find out he's trying to fuck you and he's married instead of fucking him regardless and believing anything he says
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
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