There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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