Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Randomize
