you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
I had to explain to the waiter that I'm not the DD because I can't drive, but as the Designated 'Make Sure No One Gets Roofied Or Hit By A Car On The Walk Home'-er, I should still get the free drinks.
It doesn't matter how many times you look in your purse, Your keys are not going to be there. Maybe you left them at the bar.
Maybe they fell out of my pocket last night when I rolled down the hill.
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
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