Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
Yeah man... I ordered donuts, drank wine, and cried to a movie with Seth Rogen in it. Do you really think I have my shit together?
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
Randomize