no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
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