last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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