If I had a nickel for every time I've used a condom, I'd have... two nickels.
I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
Randomize
