I would never have sex with Danny Devito!! JSYK.
Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
No subtext here. People are naked.
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
Randomize
