Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
I just woke up to my FedEx of contacts I've been waiting for for about a week and my hungover ass went to the bathroom and used beer instead of contact solution.
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
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