You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
In the 30 seconds it took me to leave the bar I let the barback motorboat me, ripped open a stranger's shirt and bit his chest, then made out with El Camino dude. No, I'm not coming out tonight.
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
I don't know whether to be insulted or flattered that I am being propositioned to have a threesome only if I wear my cat onesie
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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