i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
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he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
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I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
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