I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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