oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
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