I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
Randomize
