Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
How naked do you want me to be?
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
Randomize