i already hear my dad disowning me
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
mike has just informed me of all the things he would put in his pussy if he was a woman. this includes door stops, power drills & g.i. joes.
"and then my dad would be all like 'hey mike, where's the remote?'"
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
Randomize
