I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
my drunk uncle just explained that turkeys are not gentle lovers... and no context doesn't make it better.
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
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